Short and Long, Busy and Quiet

I mentioned earlier, that it was 10 days of active treatment, but felt longer. On day 12 is the retrieval. On day 14 or 16 is the embryo transfer. Then two weeks later is the pregnancy test. In all of that I went to the clinic on average, every other day. Lee brought me to Toronto on the 21/22, and returned the following weekend (and C came as well) (June 28/29). Lee left on July 1^st and returned on the 3^rd. On the 2^nd I packed up in Toronto and went to Orillia because I knew the appointments would be less frequent and I could be with family who know EllaGrace and I a little bit better. On the 4^th Lee and I drove to Toronto and back to Orillia. He went home on the 6^th of July and returned, with C, on the 8^th. On the 9^th all of us drove to Toronto, then back to Orillia. Then he and C went home again.

As much as the first 10 days is only a part time job, the drugs are daily. The emotional strain is by the minute. And, when I was not at the clinic, I was trying to have EllaGrace enjoy the visit. We went to the aquarium, a splash pad, the zoo, the mall, my cousin’s house, Pride events, …  but, we also napped most afternoons.

It was short and it was long. It was busy and it was quiet. And, it was hard. It never left my mind that I was doing all of this because Patrick and Maggie died, as was C. And, I was doing all this, in this way, so that I might never have to lose hope the way I did when they died. 

xx